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Post by The Witch King on Jan 26, 2003 15:47:56 GMT
It's a beautiful summers day in Rivendell. Cascading waterfalls sparkle and shimmer in the bright sunlight, all around the land is lush and plentiful. Flowers bloom in every colour, the trees sway in the gentle breeze, their branches in full leaf. The heady scent of blossom is carried on the air.
It is a picture of peacefulness and harmony. The gurgling and babbling of the river water is a gentle accompaniment to the sweet sound of Elven voices singing enchanting melodies from the woods.
The tranquil scene is broken by the sound of a horse and cart approaching from the high road.
The large black horse charges towards Rivendell at a trot. It's hooves clattering a frantic rhythm over the cobbled road as it grunts and strains to drag the rickety cart up the hill.
The wooden contraption has a squeeky wheel, which grates on the nerves of any Elf within hearing distance, it also creaks and rumbles on the uneven road. Despite its decrepid state it is overloaded with noisy Orcs, who are amusing themselves by hurling beer bottles at the unsuspecting Elves. Crammed in with them are a variety of worktools.
The horse is brought to a standstill by the driver. A tall man cloaked in black who jumps down from the cart and surveys his surroundings with distain.*
Come men, there is much work to be done here.
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Post by ~Dernhelm~ on Jan 27, 2003 16:06:15 GMT
Huzgolbon Emberkaz jumps out of the cart, flashing her pointed, rotting fangs at the sight of those disgusting elves! And they call us orcs disgraceful! Huzgol thinks with a sigh. Time to mess it all up!
"What orders from Mordor, my lord? What does the eye command?" she asks the lead orc, eager to get to work!
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Post by The Witch King on Jan 27, 2003 19:51:31 GMT
*Looks up at the great house, not seeing anyone around. Takes a crumpled note from out of his pocket and flattens it out before trying to decipher the scribbly handwriting. Clears his throat and reads aloud to the other Orcs.*
Dear Gardeners,
Firstly I must say what a great admirer I am of your gardening skills. I was lucky enough to walk in the maze garden in Hobbiton this last summer, which I believe was a creation of yours, and I was completely taken by it's beauty and simplicity. Lord Elrond has been a dear, dear friend to me over the ages and I can think of no greater way of thanking him then to surprise him with a garden of his dreams for when he returns to Rivendell at the next full moon. I would only entrust this task to such highly skilled craftsmen as yourselves and of course you will be handsomely rewarded for your time.
Regards
Lord Elfears II
*screws the note up and throws it over his shoulder with an evil laugh.*
Right, lets get started!
*Rubs his hands together eagerly.*
One of the Orcs at the back pipes up in a cockney accent*
Did we really build the maze garden?
Alan gave a short laugh.*
No. Of course not!
But who gives a stuff. They'll never know.
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Post by Imrel on Jan 28, 2003 3:23:18 GMT
*Zagalûk, a stout Orc with a rodent like face who squints as if he needs spectacles (which he does, but Mordor doesn't have an optician's, so whatcha gonna do?) hops out of the cart, almost knocking over Huzgol.*
Oh, so that big green mushy thing we worked on last summer wasn't a maze.
*He wanders forward a few feet and bumps into the wheel of the cart.*
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Post by The Witch King on Jan 28, 2003 8:41:06 GMT
Shut it Zag!
*He scowls at the orc then looks around nervously, hoping no one heard*
We don't want these Elves catching on to the fact that we're frauds. They mustn't know we're not proper gardeners or we'll lose the contract.
*Gathers the group around him and lowers his voice.*
We could earn ourselves a tidy sum here if we just play along.
*Gives them a knowing wink.*
Right! Grab tools and lets make for the meadow!
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Post by Rhiannon on Jan 28, 2003 13:09:52 GMT
*Dûlgburz checks his tools: spade, axe, rabied goat. All there and set for whatever the Lord commands*
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Post by ~Dernhelm~ on Jan 28, 2003 13:58:36 GMT
"But I'm a cook orc!" Huzgol growls under her foul breath. "Not a low class gardener!!!" She then stops so that her captain Alan does not overhear.
Huzgolbon Emberkaz then spits into her hands, rubs them together and wipes then on her face. Much better. she thinks to herself.
"As you wish, captain!" she tells Alan, making her way towards the garden. She gives Zagaluk a nasty look for almost tripping her over, yet decides to have him 'over for dinner' back when she reaches Mordor sweet home once more.
Huzgol reaches the garden, and breaks a large branch off the tree next to her. There. This shall make a fine shovel! she thinks, deciding to get to work!
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Post by Grubhosh on Jan 28, 2003 20:25:33 GMT
Grubhosh jumps out of the cart and looks at her surroundings with barely concealed distase and her compainons with even more, there was one who looked like a giant rat, a small siniveling she-orc and one with a goat. She frowned at him. Picking up a large pick axe her eyes turned to the buildings. Ugh elves had no taste all flowing organic forms and neutral colours. Maybe if she finished with the garden early she'd bet let lose on the house with a can of red paint and a sledge hammer.
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Post by Imrel on Jan 28, 2003 22:26:10 GMT
*Zag grabs the nearest tool to look like a shovel (which happens to be a pitchfork) and hurries blindly after Alan, Dûlgburz, Huzgolbon and Grubhosh. He reaches the meadow shortly, and manages to trip over a tree root not five yards in. The fork goes flying, landing point down in the springy grass several feet on. Zag curses and follows the sound of the "thud" in attempt to find it.*
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Post by Rhiannon on Jan 28, 2003 23:40:40 GMT
*Dûlgburz looks for a place to keep the goat while he'll do his best at the rose gardens. Finds a greenhouse in a backyard with bonsai trees.* Here ya go, darling. Daddy will be back in no time. *Closes the door and watches Goatie starting to nibble right away. *
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Post by The Witch King on Jan 29, 2003 8:57:47 GMT
*Arrives at the meadow and studies the scene before him.*
Hmmm.. those flower beds will have to go. And the orchard. If we chop down all the apple trees we could pave that whole area with stone slabs.
*Gets out is watercolour book and makes some sketches.*
The Hot springs can be filled in and turned into a sand pit or better still a compost heap.
*Rubs his hands together gleefully*
It's gonna look fantastic!
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Post by ~Dernhelm~ on Jan 29, 2003 9:53:07 GMT
"Compost heap? As in dung fertilizer?" Huzgol asks, not being the most intelligent of beings.
She takes her shovel (actually a broken tree branch) and begins to dig straight into Lord Elrond's foofy petunias, throwing the now ripped colorful flowers all over the place; leaving them to be trampled...
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Post by The Witch King on Jan 29, 2003 19:45:21 GMT
Okay, we need some Orcs to start cutting down the trees.
Did anyone remember to bring the big saws?
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Post by Zulu on Jan 29, 2003 19:52:09 GMT
On her daily ride along the edge of the medow Niviel comes upon the Orcs, her horse tenses as she watches Huzgol rip out the tulips she planted last spring, sending her steed into a canter she approches Alan, a slight scowl on her full pouty lips, comming to a skidding hualt infront of him excuse me, what exactly are you doing to the medow, besides ripping out my flowers?
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Post by The Witch King on Jan 29, 2003 20:14:50 GMT
Watches the approaching Elf, a grin on his face*
Alright darlin'
*looks her up and down*
Any chance of a cup of tea?
Me and the lads are parched. It's a long drive from Mordor and the services at Gondor were closed.
*looks at her expectantly|*
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